I forgot my camera again

Recent happenings

2007-05-16T20:35:00.000+09:00

Ever felt really desperate to see some photos of drunk Koreans, baseball and bald men? I thought so which is why I'm on hand to satisfy all your cravings.

Every first year student in Korea has to go on an MT (membership training) weekend with their department where they are forced into playing silly games and bullied into drinking far more than they want to by their senior students. Our English department had our MT a couple of weeks ago, I was there to help make sure things didn't get too out of hand. I like to think I made a good job of it but to be honest I was far too drunk to remember anything much.

The students may be older this year but that doesn't mean they are any more grown up

Grilled meat and booze - it's what's made Korea great (that's my boss in the middle)

On the last night Joseph and his girlfriend celebrated their anniversary. Sweet.

Last Friday I went to watch a baseball game. To my surprise I managed not to spend all night complaining about how it was nothing compared to cricket (my friend helpfully punched me everytime I started) and actually managed to enjoy myself.

I still found this man's bald pate the most interesting thing at the game though

Random pictures of getting drunk with students:

I've found a lot more interesting food shops than I managed to in Gumi so far this year but fresh herbs are still in problem. Luckily I managed to extract some of Bryant's stash of seeds and have set the little buggers to work on my balcony. If it works I plan to be the local purveyor of rare herbs, standing on street corners whispering "ey mate want an ounce of basil?"

That's it for now, I know you're all pathetically grateful that I am posting this marvellous stuff but really don't thank me I'm just happy to be of service.

I'm back!

2007-04-10T22:35:00.000+09:00

That's right I'm in Korea once again, with all new job, town and fancy camera to show you just what I get up to.

Since I know everyone must be quite literally dying to know what I've been doing since I last updated this page in November, here are some pictures to sate your curiosity, don't get too excited now...

I left Korea on Dec 1st. Good timing for a spot of Christmas dinner.

I followed that up with a trip to Rome and Florence with some friends for New Year's. Both places were very pretty and I got diarrhea.

So then back to Korea. Jobless. Luckly Bryant and Traci are living in my old apartment and they offered me the sofa for a few nights. Oh the fools. I ended up staying for 4 weeks doing nothing but scratching my arse while they went out to work all day Mwah ha ha

Whilst I was in England they had acquired a Kieth and a Jenny. Kieth is a genial Canadian, Jenny is a hot American but also a vegetarian and hence not to be trusted

Eventually I stopped scratching, got up and went to Japan. This was no mere whimsical trip though but a serious mission to obtain a Korean work visa in Fukuoka.

So that I could come back and work here - Konyang University (http://www.konyang.ac.kr/english/). I like it.

Konyang is in the small city of Nonsan (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nonsan). There are around 8000 students at the university spending their parent's money on beer

I have a nice new apartment to go with the job and a not so nice drunk old twat downstairs who bangs on the floor if I fart too loudly

I also have my own office where I do astonishingly little work

In fact I spend most of my time at our Daejeon campus distracting Moon Hee from her work while I wait for the rare occasions when I have to teach a class. (N.B. She wouldn't let me use the photo I took today because "glasses not pretty" and insisted on emailing me a better one instead. She will read this so I won't comment)

These uni students get younger every year! Actually the uni has me teaching this one class of kids. They provide a nice contrast to the hungover psychotherapy or management students who I spend the rest of my time with.

Nonsan's claim to fame in the world is as a strawberry producer. Last weekend saw the annual strawberry festival. Some friends from Gumi came, we got drunk and you are now up to date. Expect more photos as soon as I do anything interesting or (more likely) after I've done nothing of interest at all. Bye for now..

Autumn and stuff

2006-11-08T01:00:00.000+09:00

Happy news for anyone who's suffered from reading all my rubbish: this is very likely my last post from Korea - at least for this year anyway. There is still the chance I'll inflict more inane ramblings on you when I return next year.

Anyways it's November now and bloody cold to boot. I've not really done a great deal recently due to my attempts to stem the flow of cash that seems to slip perpetually through my fingers but I did realise that I've never really posted any photos that show what we get up to at work so here are some of the Halloween party we had last month (there is also a truly horrendous video of me dancing in the batman suit but I'm not sure the public is ready for that). Korea actually looks quite nice in the Autumn so I've added a few snaps I took out on the bike the other day as well. And a few of my face looking fucked up that I made when I was bored. because.

Would you believe me if I told you they dress like this every day?

Elly cant decide whether to be an angel or demon

Erica knows she's safe in Gotham now

Sunny goes for some wierd witch/Dame Edna/Elton John effect

Charlie and Sally in special candy finding glasses

Autumn stuff

It won't be long before this snow plow is in use, glad I'm swapping it for an exotic Birkenhead winter

I cant help thinking this one makes me look a bit like a horse

Curry and Palaces

2006-09-11T00:21:00.000+09:00

I do love a good curry. Unfortunately the residents of Gumi have not yet embraced the delights of cuisine from the subcontinent and so until last night I had been a full 10 months without even so much as a hint of a poppadom.
Saturdays are usually quite hectic here and yesterday was no exception as I sat on the sofa in my pants busily flicking between old episodes of CSI and Korean gameshows. Rob was in Seoul though, gloating about the Indian restaurant he was visiting in the evening and there's only so much I can take. I've never traveled for 3 hours before just for one meal but I'm happy to report that it was completely worth it, right down to the last morsel of naan stuffed into my distended belly.
Today then I was in Seoul with nothing much to do. I've never really done any of the tourist sights there so I wondered around Insadong, a nice area with lots of traditional shops and the best place to buy Korean tat and then went to Gyeonbokgung palace. It's very big and was probably home to some kings at some time or another. As it was an unscheduled visit I didn't have my camera so these are taken on my phone, sorry if they're a bit rubbish.

JEJU!

2006-09-02T21:39:00.000+09:00

Well I did say this would be occasional and what with moving house, working overtime due to new teachers coming and then leaving rapidly and stupid stupid spur of the moment 6am trips to the casino I just haven't found the time to bother with such fripperies as a photo blog.

But right now I find myself hungover yet strangely unable to sleep and so I'm taking the opportunity to post some pictures of our holiday to Jeju island at the end of July. It might give you some idea as to why I'm keen on coming back to Korea next year.

We've not even landed and we've already found a beach. Brilliant

An hour later

Don't ask

A pretty mermaid lady

And a nice sunset

It wasn't all beaches. Halla san is the biggest mountain in Korea so we thought we'd give it a climb

Joan and Marie put in the hard yards

The weather at the top was a little changeable

We got quite lucky with hotel rooms. This was the view from one...

...and this from another

Paradise

GIANT BABY UNLEASHES REIGN OF TERROR ON JEJU AIRPORT!

The Eiffel Tower - authentic Korean architecture at its finest

Me getting in the way of some nice scenery

And tramping around in some tea fields

Sogwipo's world cup football stadium. Can't be too bad playing your home games here

I don't look like this because I'm in a maze, gormless spastic is just my default expression

What's Korean for "Brucie bonus"?

Holidaying can be hard work

This large rock is called sunrise peak and so, like fools, we decided to climb it at 4:30 on our last morning to watch the sun come up

But I think it was worth the effort in the end.

Mud, Bikes, The Official Worst Experience Of My Life. Ever. And A Fond Farewell

2006-07-25T02:36:00.000+09:00

I promised this would be occasional and it has been. But now I'm back with stunning all new pictures that I didn't even take myself because I was scared of getting my camera all sandy and muddy. The reason it might have gotten sandy and muddy was because we went to a huge MUD festival which was held on a beach which funnily enough was quite SANDY. The festival was in a fairly inaccessible place over on the west coast about 150 miles from Gumi. Greg, Bryant and I decided the only sensible thing to do therefore was to ride there on our puny 125cc bikes. Leaving at the perfectly reasonable time of midnight. At that point it was the longest I'd been on the bike and pretty much the most fun.

Taking a break half way to Boreyong

The bungees that'd been strapping the tent to my bike on the way there. Oh dear

Everyone together looking happy - but no mud

That's better

Muddy nipple tweaking - Top that

What a beast

Traci limbered up for the big street party which followed the day of mud

For which even the sea got dressed up in it's party clothes

We all enjoyed it and this man assured us he had a thoroughly nice time too

Ouch! The next morning after the alcohol had worn off and I'd realised just how sunburnt I was Greg, Bryant and I decided to keep on riding up the coast to Taen national park. This time though the predicted rain decided to set in (we were in the middle of the typhoon season don't you know) and Greg - under the type of pressure only a girlfriend can apply - decided it was too fool hardy a mission for him and left Bryant and I to discover new depths of wetness on our own.

[Also I know you all secretly wanted more topless pictures of me and who am I to disappoint you (and just look how the belly has gone down since last time!)]

Once in the park Bryant and I had a good look around and saw...

Some pituresque fishing boats
A mini lighthouse
Some big arches

Some comical fishSome prehistoric looking bugs (which we threw things at)
And some disabled fishermen (I didn't throw anything at him)

On the Monday there was another typhoon passing through the country causing heavy rains throughout Korea and severe flooding in some parts. The ride home took us 10 hours in the worst conditions possible. It was fucking horrible and I never want to do anything like it ever again.

That was all the weekend before last. Over the more recent weekend we had a big leaving do for several people whos contracts are up and are leaving Korea now. I'm off on my holidays this week to the tropical paradise that is Jeju island so I'll be back with more photos in the not too distant future. Bet you cant wait.

All the single women I know feast your eyes on what you're missing by not coming to Korea. You must be gutted

Joan and I try out our Posh Spice pouts. Honours even I think

Buildings prove no obstacle to me when there's a party to be found

It took me hours the next day to remember where all the scrapes and cuts on my limbs had come from
Rob shows just how impressed he is by my rooftop antics. Charming

Bye bye beer

2006-06-20T01:53:00.000+09:00

I've made several attempts to shift the pot belly over the years, and stuck with none of them. I had grown to be fairly comfortable with looking like I have a pudding basin strapped to my midriff (and I do quite like the sound it makes when I slap it) but I have now been tempted into making one more effort to shift it after a novel idea was floated to me - giving up beer.

The downside to this is obvious, but there are a surprising amount of upsides. First of course it might do something to remove the watermelon that appears to be residing halfway up my body. There is also a ready made support group as Bryant and Traci have similarly decided to give up on anything hop related. Finally it means I will now be able to fully embrace the national Korean drink of Soju, that lovely concoction of ethanol and water. Yum.

Modesty almost made me resist from putting up a pic of the focus of this post, but it is a photo diary and besides, Bryant's put a pic of his on his blog (see the link below) so I feel I have to now. All those of a delicate disposition really shouldn't have read this far.

Football part 2

2006-06-19T00:40:00.000+09:00

I'm waiting up for the Korea - France game at 4am so to wile away the time I thought I'd post some pictures from Korea's first game in the world cup which we watched on the big screen here at Gumi's stadium, just round the corner from my apartment. For those of you who for some inexplicable reason are not keeping meticulous statistical records of every game in Germany, Korea beat Togo 2-1, a fact that has led to most of my students confidently stating that they are now destined to go on to beat Brazil by a minimum of 5 goals in the final on July 9th. Good luck with that then.

The crowd started arriving early

And no wonder when the pre-match entertainment was being provided by these lovely ladies

This man offered soju in the spirit of international relations

And Joan accepted

Craig seemed more interested in teacher - student relations. Dirty bugger

All the crowd needed now was a goal

When one came they were pretty happy

Happy enough for fireworks

Lots of fireworks

This girl has the best hair in all Korea. FACT.

Rosine celebrates with some pissed up Koreans (keep your eye on that towel)

Now what kind of fool would allow those guys to use said towel to fling him up in the air. Oh, it's me

2 Wheeled Grave Machines

2006-06-12T23:39:00.000+09:00

I really love my bike but with the considerable weight of a whole 2 (two - count 'em) months riding experience behind me I'm beginning to yearn for a bit more than a 125cc can provide. This 650cc beast is at the top of Hyosung's range and has firmly caught the attention of my beady little eye as a contender to be next years death trap. I just need to find the 5000000 or so won necessary to make it mine now.

This post has been in no way a contrived attempt to shoe horn in the revelation that it's fairly likely I'll be in Korea for another year, I just wanted to show you all how nice this bike is - honest.

Football and stuff

2006-06-12T01:48:00.000+09:00

The world cup has started. Brilliant. In a game packed with quality almost indistinguishable from that on show in Germany our Gumi foreigner team took on another foreigners team in Daegu today. We all gave it our best out there in the blazing sunshine and ultimately fulfilled all expectations in us by getting spanked 7 - 1. We're playing in a tournament in a few weeks as well. Oh shit.

Like all top athletes Brent knows a quick beer is the best way to get back on your feet and back on the pitch

Joan weighs the pros and cons of sticking with a reliable 4-4-2 system or packing the midfield with 5 and trying to hit a lone target man before reaching the predictable conclusion that it didn't matter - we'd be shit either way

Fraiser demonstrates exactly how much losing by 6 goals takes it out of you

Some other shit that's been happening recently.

A random buddha

Greg and Bryant get ready for a swim in one of Korea's many beautifully polluted rivers that we found out on a ride last week

A 10 yr old student's artistic impression of me. Cheers Vincent

Sung Jung Dong sunset

Fucking typical. Two weeks after I burned my leg touching the engine of my bike while riding in shorts and I do it again - in exactly the same place. What a mong

Backdating is cool

2006-06-02T00:27:00.000+09:00

Today seems like a good day to start a blog. I've just come in from celebrating my birthday with some friends, I'm not drunk (that can wait till the weekend) and I also just realised that seen as I got here on December 1st, today also marks my 6 month point in Korea.

I don't intend any subsequent post to contain as much writing as this one. The idea is to post photos now and again as a substitute for sending badly written, irrelevant mass emails to people I barely know or like back home. These should be accompanied by little or no comment as although there's no real evidence for it, it is scientific fact that anyone who isn't a professional writer but still insists on presenting material for public consumption inevitably ends up sounding like a proper twat.

This is a photo diary of my time in Korea and as I've already been here 6 months a little backdating is required to show how the first half year has passed. If this doesn't make you so desperate to get to Gumi that you'd consider sitting outside Heathrow airport handing out blowjobs for cash and airmiles then don't expect the next 6 months to raise even a smile.

December was a little nippy

I think this was at Easter

Joan is cornered by the santa police...

...whilst Rob and I convince them we look like this all year round

Nice arse

His ice sledge ran out of petrol

Well I thought I looked pretty sexy

And all the old women on the train agreed

Lily tries on my jacket for size and stops hitting me for 5 minutes

A big buddha

And a temple to go with it

Joan is drying her wet jeans, Rob's foot is in plaster, Japanese porn is on in the background. Not much more can be said.

Pig

His wares were shit but he did let me wear his hat

Cherry blossom

Joan suddenly realises the man standing next to her is not her 6ft 3" boyfriend

Whereas Joe seems to have found his ideal partner

Don't take them outside. They'll only go feral

Meditation

Probably the best (and only) all foreigner football team in Gumi

A new toy

It looks even better without me on it

Don't mess with Wooin

They might have looked the part but they were really, really shit

4 out of 5 women still only rated me as second best looking

-If you could read a map properly we wouldn't be in this mess.

-Shut up twat

I like ponds

Bryant and Traci make the most of the only bit of real grass in Korea

A temple, Gyeongju

This is actually nicer than my flat

Wooin bug cemetary

Train, padddy fields and small bird